Ok, I don't know why this bugs me, but it does so I'm just going to get it off my chest… It has been bugging me every Christmas since we've had kids.
It has to do with what we teach our kids about Santa Claus.
My girls are 5 and 3 now. And my kindergartener, especially, is getting exposure from other sources, besides her parents, as to who Santa Claus is and what Christmas is all about.
In our LDS religion, along with other Christian denominations, we emphasize Christmas to be about the Christ child. And anything else, i.e. Santa Claus and the North Pole and chimneys and reindeer are fun and magical but they represent the secular and fictional side of Christmas.
My girls have been beyond stoked about Christmas this year. They spend lots of time hanging out at the tree and studying the gifts underneath it.
Just the other night at FHE Ben asked Emily, "Em, do you know why we celebrate Christmas?" "Ummm, Santa Claus?" she ventured. As her parents our initial, natural reaction was to correct her, as though she answered the question earnestly, but incorrectly. "No. It's not about Santa." She looked confused. He went on to ask, "Do you know what the TRUE meaning of Christmas is?" "Jesus?" she guessed again. "Right!!!" Then we proceeded to read the scripture story from her illustrated Bible.
Can you see how this would be confusing to a small child? She's being bombarded with images and songs and stories and movies about Santa Claus, but he's not "why" we celebrate Christmas. We often hear this phrase "the TRUE meaning of Christmas." If there's a true meaning, then that implies that there's a false one as well.
My question is why do we have to have two separate Christmas narratives? The fat jolly Santa who dishes out the goodies vs. the reverent, holy Christ child who gave us the ultimate gift. It's hard to see how the two relate, and it frustrates me. I don't like lying to my kids. It goes against my natural instinct. And I don't like the thought of them having to "find out" that Santa isn't for real some day. A friend just lamented on Facebook that her newly enlightened 10 year old is begrudging them for lying to him all these years. And if kids learn about the Americanized, secularized Santa Claus only to find out he's bogus, where does that leave them?
My proposal is why not blend the two versions… Santa Claus and the Christ child? Why not tell our kids the TRUTH about who St. Nicolas really was? No, he's not a fat guy in a red suit who lives with elves at the North Pole. He was a Greek Christian bishop who lived in what is now Turkey hundreds of years ago. His parents died when he was young and he inherited a huge amount of wealth. He was a disciple of Christ who did his best to lead a Christ like life. He gave to the poor. He loved children. He used his wealth to assist the needy, the sick, and the suffering. Isn't that a much more beautiful (and true!) story than flying reindeer? And then it's not such a huge jump to the "true" meaning of Christmas. We can still fib about him coming to visit our homes on Christmas Eve… and yes, someday they'll learn that St. Nick didn't really visit our house, but at least he's not a completely made-up character. What we've told them about him is TRUE! And inspiring. And a much more accurate version of what Christmas is all about.
Ben thinks I'm nuts. What do you think?
www.stnicholascenter.org
Except that Nikolaus comes on the sixth to leave candy and nuts in shoes. :-)
ReplyDeleteYep they do that here in Germany... It's lots of fun
ReplyDeleteI know - I am German and I live in Stuttgart (and therefore really enjoy your blog).
ReplyDeleteYour proposal sounds good, by the way.
One of my favorite bloggers wrote something you might be interested to read. http://neonfresh.com/christmas-without-santa/
ReplyDeleteI totally feel your pain Marinda! Lance and I have conversations about Santa on a regular basis this time of the year. We don't want to lie to our kids either, but I really enjoy some of the traditions that come with Santa and his helpers. It's becoming even more of a struggle lately because B is starting to ask lots of questions. She even wants to google, "Is Santa real?" We have always just tried to dodge the question. "What do you think, B?" Or we leave off the 'from' name on gifts. Then she asks, "Who is this from?" Same thing. "Who do you think?" I like your idea of talking about St. Nicholas. It's certainly fits the true feeling of Christmas better. It's even harder when everyone around promotes Santa. This year at B's school she was supposed to write about her Elf on the Shelf (which we don't do because of the same reason) and so she had to make up these huge elaborate stories. Super frustrating. We continue to try to think of ways to make this work. If you come up with any other ideas, pass them along! For real. I'm always looking for good ideas!
ReplyDelete